Sex: The Male Mind and the Body Politic

Everyone knows how Anthony Weiner sex-texted his junk nationwide under the moniker of: “Carlos Danger.” His “crime” of textophilia is really rather limp by comparison to the scandals generated by other politicians, but then again, it’s not a contest. Across the boards for politicians and cheating husbands alike, it’s the lying part that’s the biggest problem. Sadly due to our attitudes in America, lying about one’s sexual behavior is more common than openness no matter who you are. But we expect our leaders to be held to a higher standard than we mere mortals—ignoring the fact that they’re also human. Not to mention that the lust for political power is itself is often a sign of weakness, insecurity, insanity or all three. In short: Never vote for anyone who really desires the job. With rare exception, voters generally don’t find out whether or not a candidate is a sex maniac until after they’ve elected them. At least with Anthony Weiner you know what you’re getting into–in fact you already know whether he “dresses” to the left or the right.

That said, we are a society that condemns sexuality in the same breath as our obsession with every salacious detail. Being open about sexuality of any definition is frowned upon while every American’s ears perk-up to hear each naughty word or deed. That’s America for you. When the late French prime minister, François Mitterand died, his wife and his mistress openly consoled each other at his funeral. The only nation who’s citizens were were shocked were Americans.

As a man myself, I’m sympathetic to the plight of sex-obsessed men because I do believe the male animal is programmed to continually think about sex. I certainly do. After all, we men might be killed while hunting a mastodon leaving all the women of the clan to rely on one lucky bastard who survived the hunt to inseminate all the females, lest the population of the tribe should dwindle.

Leadership positions generate high stress—stress is relieved by sexual release. Kings, presidents, potentates and pharaohs all had mistresses if not harems to help elevate that known killer: “Stress.” FDR had a mistress. Eisenhower had a mistress—so did JFK, all of whom got a “pass” from the press. But Jimmy Carter got crucified for being faithful to his wife while admitting he’d at times “lusted in his heart.”

Former New York Governor, Eliot Spitzer fought tirelessly against human trafficking, but turned out to be on the short list of a madam’s clients frequenting the services of $3,000 a night call girls which is a mixed message to say the least. But he was also one of the most powerful voices of reason railing against the abuses of Wall Street–only to be brought down by a sex-scandal just when we needed him most. The male animal has proven time and again that he’s incapable of prioritizing sex to somewhere lower on the to-do list. We Americans love a good sex scandal—and turn a blind eye when suddenly all the good works one might have done evaporate–outweighed by humiliation and public disgrace. Americans can’t tell the truth about sex and we’re all condemned if we lie. The secret to political survival in this country is low-“T”.

Former senator and right-wing family man, Larry Craig was outraged by the Bill Clinton/Monica Lewinski stained-dress and cigar sex scandal. He indignantly called for President Clinton to resign or face impeachment. Larry Craig survived the sexual blood bath of ensuing holier-than-thou politicians “outed” by Hustler publisher, Larry Flynt’s undercover exposé that led to a waft of congressional resignations and the utter humiliation of then Speaker of the House, Newt Gingrich. But ultimately Senator Larry Craig, the vehemently anti-sex and anti-gay family man, was caught with his pants down in a homosexual encounter in an airport bathroom–having lied to his wife, his constituents and intimately to himself. Craig preferred his male partners to stand with their feet in a shopping bag so anyone passing by his toilet stall might simply assume the gentleman had a puppy squirming in a shopping bag—like that might be misconstrued for normal bathroom behavior. The examples are endless, from disgraced ex-navy man and ousted Rep. Eric Massa playing up-periscope “snorkel” with male congressional pages—to New York Rep. Chris Lee posting semi-nude photos of himself on Craig’s List (not to be confused with Larry Craig’s list). It should be pointed out that Rep. Chris Lee was attending a government seminar on Internet security at the time his sex-ad went live—genius, sheer genius.

Some sexually disgraced male politicians find redemption—or at least reelection—and some don’t. Governor Mark Sanford of South Carolina took a fictitious “trip” down the Appalachian Trail to have a tryst in South America with his Argentinian mistress–but later got elected to Congress representing hypocritical bible belters. But former presidential hopeful Gary Hart “invited” reporters to follow him if they wanted to, just to prove he wasn’t having an extramarital affair. He probably shouldn’t have made that invitation, because as soon as photos of him with his mistress, Donna Rice surfaced and were published his political viability was in the crapper.

Currently San Diego Mayor Bob Filner has been caught red-handed making inappropriate sexual advances to staff members. He’s plunged his tongue down their throats in front of witnesses and requested women staffers to wear short skirts and no underwear. Yet the son of a bitch refuses to resign. The City of San Diego has actually set-up a public hotline for people who’ve been sexually harassed by the mayor to call and file their complaints. Filner is a former member of the House of Representatives from the State of California. You can’t tell me this behavior is a new development. It was merely easier to get away with it in perverse old Washington, DC. And so the legacy of male dominated sex, power and corruption continues even as male legislators nationwide attempt to undermine women’s sexual health issues with no real understanding of those issues. It’s mind-numbing.

In summation: All men ever think about is sex. All I ever think about is sex. I get other things done of course, but like a program on the computer running ever so evasively in the background, sex is never far from my mind. Let me spell it out for you: Men are just grown-up little boys, and even as school boys, all we ever thought about is sex. Is it any clearer now? I despair that the history of the world has been written largely by the distracted and sticky palms of the male gender when women are much better qualified to govern the world. I put a lot of stock in the maternal instinct. But here’s the question: Are women in politics less inclined to sexual indiscretions or are they merely better at getting away with it? I suspect women are better at controlling their sexual impulses. It’s not that women don’t have impulses, I suspect they view their role in life differently. Perhaps we should just hand world governance over to the fair sex. Of course that would only work if laws are passed forbidding men from wielding authority or power of any sort. Women can bear the children and men can be stay-at-home dads, raising children, washing, ironing and preparing meals—if they get all their chores done with time to spare—they can philander to their heart’s desire. Men have made a mess of this world for thousands of years. Perhaps it’s time to turn the reigns of power over to our mothers and sisters, because men have had their chance and (ahem) blown it.

– Disassociated Press, 7/25/2013

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5 thoughts on “Sex: The Male Mind and the Body Politic

  1. For every sex scandal in American politics, I just think of the South American politician, who was sent pictures of himself with a well-known prostitute, threatening to disclose the images if he didn’t drop out of the race. He used the pictures for his campaign ads, showing the voters how much he was a “virile male” “Macho man” type. He won by a landslide, because that was important in their culture.
    We need to stop being hypocritical, deifying the “virile male” and the “hot” woman, but then castigating them for being sexual creatures. So someone likes sex, SO WHAT? Unless they make their sex life a distraction from their jobs, it is between them, and whoever their partner(s) may be.

    • Until America moves away from our puritanical heritage, the public themselves will see to it that sexual issues distract from the job at hand when a ‘hand job’ seems to be what so many male politicians would prefer.

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