John Boehner Finds Time to Touch-up His Tan

House Speaker, John Boehner, not known for having aptitude at much of anything, managed somehow to multi-task by touching-up on his suntan during the President’s State of the Union address last night.  According to authorities, special ultraviolet tanning bulbs were installed directly above the Speaker lest he start to look pasty under the chin.

It cannot have been easy for the top-ranking House Republican to stand, applaud and hold a tanning reflector throughout the entire hour and five minute speech.  Even more difficult was the challenge of listening to Barack Obama list (in all modesty) the litany of accomplishments he has to his own credit — most of which were issues bungled by the previous Republican administration due to a severe deficit of competence.  President Obama was able to take credit for everything from taking-out Osama Bin Laden with minimal elite forces (as opposed to 9 years worth of incomprehensible losses of life, limb, blood and treasure) to budding signs of growth as Obama has wrestled a slow-down in the out-of-control economic train-wreck left in the wake of George W. Bush.

Republicans had already started dissing the president’s address long before they’d heard a word of it, reinforcing their own paranoia about having nothing to offer the American people but wedge issues, stalling techniques and failure — embodied by the clown-car of candidates, one of whom they hope to palm-off on us in November, 2012.

The State of the Union rebuttal was given by embattled Indiana Governor Mitch Daniels who boasts the embarrassing blot on his resume of having served as George W. Bush’s Chief Economic Adviser.  Mr Daniels’ words were largely in glowing agreement with the president — except when it came to the subject of the economy — Daniels feels the Republicans could do a much worse job, and hope the voting public with give them another chance to make all of our lives more difficult and riddled with fear.  Mitch Daniels has as much, if not more economic blood on his hands as Bush and Cheney combined — so he seemed to be an odd choice to take Obama to task for not making enough economic progress cleaning-up the mess Daniels himself played such a large part in creating.

The goal of Daniels’ rebuttal, is much the same as that of the GOP presidential hopefuls by attempting to get citizens nostalgic about reliving the failures of the previous administration.  John Boehner is personally doing his part by trying to achieve a skin-tone that’s a half-dozen shades darker than the president’s own in an effort to reach-out to ethnic and racial minorities.  Face it, the GOP hates it when Obama tells it like it is and hits one out of the park — because all the Republicans have to offer is revisionist history and wedge issues — fostered by an optimistic belief the American public has such a short memory span they’ll forget how we got into this mess in the first place.  But back to the issues at hand, would you like your wedge issues with or without bacon and bleu cheese dressing?

- Dissociated Press, 1/26/2012

5 thoughts on “John Boehner Finds Time to Touch-up His Tan

  1. I find it both disgusting and infuriating that even before Obama had said a word, the likes of Caribou Barbie, “Whine Along With Mitch” McConnell, Witless Santorum et. al. were preparing speeches blasting him for “campaigning”. Hell, they are career politicians, too. They know damn good and well that a politician is campaigning every time he opens his mouth. I’d EXPECT him to have a certain amount of campaign rhetoric in any speech in such an important election year. He knows as well as we do, if not better, the damage the Ratpublican’ts plan to cause if they take the White House and Senate, and keep the House. And he is working 24/7 to ensure that does not happen, while trying to repair the damage the 8 years of “Amateur Hour in the White House” caused.
    The hatred and vilification levied on Barack Obama because a black man had the skills, intelligence and the timing with a message about change, to win the White House has exposed the racism of the cockroaches of the GOP to the light of day.

  2. Now if only the population at large would start paying attention – in fact let’s hope they prove to HAVE an attention span.

    • GD Star Ratingloading…I was not surprised at all when I saw what was about to paphen, problem here is the global elitist oligarchy is puppet master to both parties, the same elitist banker(s) controlling the dems controls the republicans, its all theater, you know the saying, politics is for ugly people that could not make it in Hollywood . In public view they are bitter rivals and behind closed doors they are sharing drinks and making deals. Both parties are corrupt to the point of absolute no return. Each and every one of them have so much dirt on each other how could they possibly roll. The corrupt overseeing the corrupt, and now the puppet master has control over every single federal agency we have, our judges have been hand picked by the same corrupt few that control all the governments worldwide. And unless we abolish the federal reserve and get our greenback back we will never see anything but this continue to paphen. It simply put is the largest ponzi scheme in the history of the entire world.The ones responsible are above all worldwide governments, have been for decades, and they have spent much time in their plan to destroy this country. They knew long ago the way to gain global control was to destroy the United States and the only way this would paphen was from within. And the truly disturbing fact, they are NOT doing this for money it’s for POWER and Global domination, a new world order . And they are extremely close to their objective. The fact of the matter is this, the cuts just made would be like saying to your friend, I only have $3.00 to give you back from that loan of $333,333,333.00. It’s all about re-election, and until we have term limits on these lifers nothing is going to change, it’s only going to get worse and worse. But on a good note if we can make it to 2012 without incident we may just have a chance. God Bless and pray for our troops, their families, and most of all this great country we all adore.

    • I totally leibeve in the right to choose Union or not, but do the people who are here standing for this understand how anti-Union in your state will lower your wages, lower your benefits and not allow you to stand up to work conditions as a group. I love individual freedom, but you can have that AND a collective group standing behind you as a Union.It is NOT dead, it is still STRONG snd serves a purpose for the Union worker and to install rights that you non-Union members have learned to enjoy .a 40 hour workweek, an 8 hour day, a lunch break, maternal leave, I could go on for hours This was all becase Union members hav stood together in solidarity.Those against this have no concept.Long live individual rights to choose or not choose but do not bash Unions who have enabled you to write the messages of hate and allowed you the respectible wage good enough to buy the message in the PC you could afford to type upon. )

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