The Pitiful Remains of the RNC: Have They Angered God and Other Extraterrestrials?

Has anyone seen the pitiful remains of the RNC lately?  Everyone from Joe Biden to Hurricane Issac have made reservations in Tampa to view the remains soon to be on display at the Republican Convention.  It’s only logical to conclude that the Republican Party has angered the Gods and other extraterrestrials based on the weather forecast alone.  But acts of God notwithstanding, the entire GOP presidential nomination process culminating in the unsavory ticket now facing conservatives has been a freak circus from start to finish.  ONLY a tropical hurricane could upstage the most surreal elimination of presidential hopefuls in living memory.  From the beginning the RNC has been dogged with “gaffs,” obscene corn-dog photo-ops and illogical sound-bites; all of which would have once been considered headline buffoonery outlandish even by the National Inquirer’s standards, presuming they have any.  The GOP is a party in complete and utter disarray.

Enter Todd Akin….

Even while the airwaves in every swing state in the nation are ripe with attack ads using the hushed, sultry over-voice of a no-nonsense woman accusing Barack Obama of everything from murdering Santa Claus to instigating the Boer War the real attention has been on the latest series of passive/aggressive assaults on a recently diagnosed preexisting condition known as being “born female.”  Everything the over-voice lady says is suspect and distorted and subliminally geared toward the sex-crazed male ear, purring venom in every sultry tone.  The Madison Avenue whores use a woman to deliver the over-voice, but the ads themselves couldn’t steer further afield from addressing genuine women’s concerns.  But courtesy of Todd Akin, the Republican War on Women is back on message front and center.

There is little good to say about a man who thinks raped women secrete their own personhood-killing morning-after juices during the height of a sexual assault.  The man is ill-informed and crazy.  No matter how much he tries to back-peddle what he said, his words will stick and splash all over the Romney/Ryan ticket.  It’s trickle-down guilt by association.  Ryan and Akin have been frequent co-sponsors of prehistorically insensitive legislation targeted at controlling the life choices and rights of women.  Akin is attempting to jump from the House of Representatives over to the Senate by trying to defeat Missouri’s incumbent senator, Claire McCaskill, who represents not only Missouri, but the voice of reason.  She doesn’t cotton to the over-voice GOP lady and her doom and gloom scenario condemning Barack Obama.  McCaskill knows she’s on the front lines of protecting women’s rights, and her opponent’s gaffs and missteps have most likely secured her reelection.  Here are Senator McCaskill’s own words:

“For the state I love, I hope this is a moment for everyone who hasn’t been paying close attention.  This statement is a window into Todd Akin’s mind.  I hope this is one of those gut check moments when they [Missouri voters] say this is not somebody we want speaking for us on the floor of the United States Senate.”

The only good thing to be said about Todd Akin, is he’s forthright enough to stand-by his own irrational dogma rather than trying to conceal it from the eyes and ears of swing voters – which is a lot more honest than what Mitt Romney and Paul Ryan are attempting to pull-off.  Basically no one in his or her right mind is really enthusiastic about Mitt Romney except those who want to see him defeated.  He’s a weak and scatterbrained leader incapable of inspiring passion or adhering to one cohesive message.  The Republican Party refuses to admit they’re still lost in the quagmire they were dropped-off in, in the wake of the Bush Administration.  And, speaking of Republican administrations, nothing about Romney/Ryan leads anyone to believe either man’s end goal is anything other than power and the intention to misuse it: Starting with women….

When a political party isn’t solidified within it’s own ranks and facing overwhelming moral indignation from women and the men who love them (across party lines) then it only makes sense that party’s convention should be hit by a tropical storm.  I interpret it as a sign of disapproval from the Lord on high.  After all, that’s what the Religious Right says whenever misfortune befalls anyone who disagrees with their worldview.  Perhaps the Angel Moroni will watch over them, waiting to clobber the convention with some kind of post biblical catastrophe like the legendary destruction of the Seven Cities of Gold?  Who knows?  But what modern Republicans should take away from the experiences of this entire process is:  Next time book your convention at “Area 51.”

- Dissociated Press, 8/23/2012

9 thoughts on “The Pitiful Remains of the RNC: Have They Angered God and Other Extraterrestrials?

  1. I’m sure the Tampa area prostitution sector is expecting an RNC-related bump in income. Nope, move along—no hypocrisy here.

    But wouldn’t it be beautiful if they got slammed by TS/Hurricane Isaac and had to rely on FEMA to rescue them? A perfect storm, if you will, of weather denial and hatred of big government vs. reality!

    • Say “Amen” somebody. I don’t want the Convention Center roof to actually collapse on them, but a dose of inconveniently truthful weather is definitely in order. BTW – I was heartened to read that the Tampa Convention Center was built with a Federal subsidy. Irony is a beautiful thing.

      PS – David, you and yours be safe and wise during the storm.

      • I would not complain if the roof did fall in on them, especially during that windbag Christie’s speech. But, no such luck, and it looks like the self-congratulations fest is going off without a hitch.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

You may use these HTML tags and attributes: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <strike> <strong>